Pamela Craven Davies

I think I do this automatically, I can’t help myself, but I need someone to say hay yes this is reflective writing. What’s the difference between critical thinking and reflective writing? Is reflective writing about what your critical mind has been thinking about? I do this all day, every day and its exhausting. I’m exhausted and this is another reason why I am doing my MA Creative Practice now. I want to change, I talk about doing all the time when I am not thinking. I need to start doing. I thought I was starting to do! a week ago. I had my space ready, I had canvas’s ready and I had started drawing a portrait in a sketch book, which as mentioned before I think I can’t draw and don’t like the lines I make. So that was a big thing for me no matter how small for someone else. I went to two lectures. One at the cinema with my daughter to see Gauguin, which I am hoping to follow up with a visit at the National Gallery, London, which has an exhibition on Gauguin Portraits and of course I went to the lecture at the Harrogate Decorative and Fine Art Group. So on a roll I thought I was doing okay. Until I had to work. I had to work, Thursday through to Sunday at the NEC, I knew it would block my mind artistically, so I knew I would mentally have to push myself back into it. I love art and making it but if I am not mentally in the right place I avoid it. My daughter was then ill for two days, and slowly I slipped into my, negative state, I’m going to call it. Without going into too much detail non art related my relationship at home with my partner is fraught with anxiety on my behalf. Not his. I analyse and wallow in self pity, I’ve just looked it up in the dictionary, this is me, I’m finding it hard to accept my situation and my circumstance in life, I constantly mull and muse over my problems, although I dont have the craving for the sympathy and condolences of others. I just keep on this cycle of worry and turmoil. This I am giving into and using as a constant excuse. Although I do enjoy writing about it, it is giving me some relief I feel. So after indulging in my week long self pity, am I now pushing myself to start from where I left off? So now I think I need to do some kind of fun mind map, some research into my practice and some critical thinking and writing about what I have done in my next post. Still need to work out how to add photos on here.